Extroverted Introvert

If pressed, I'll say that I don't like people very much. I say that because it shocks most people. I don't really hate other people, it's just that I don't have much use for the surface personalities of 99% of the people I meet. If I got to know them better, maybe I'd like them, but somehow my tough exterior never lets me get that far.

However, my rather sociopathic view towards others was put on its head when I took a Myers-Briggs personality test a couple of years ago. Come to find out, I have extrovert tendencies and draw my energy from others. As you can see, this puts me in a rather awkward position.

Instead of working with others, I've been internally competing against others for years. I blame this partially on my mom, who is competitive even with her daughters when it comes to vanity-related matters. You win, Mom, I can never be as skinny as you are.

Recently, I discovered that a law school acquaintance started her own jewlery business. It's similar to mine in name and style. Going by my history, I should declare my hatred for this interloper and put a hex on her beading hands.

However, something else has happened. I've contacted her by email to let her know about our similarities. Turns out we have waaay more in common than I thought. We're both commercial real estate attorneys, have both traveled to Maui since law school, both make jewelry and we were both candidates for the same job back in 2007 (which neither of us got). Okay, I've explained all this in an earlier post, so let's press forward to the point, which is....

Instead of petty jealously, I feel really inspired by my friend and the changes she's made in her life. It inspires me to get my ass moving. I should be in bed right now, but I stayed up to finish a necklace. I'll be up a lot this week since I want to have our photography up and running on our official site by next week.

The point is, I am actually feeding off someone else's energy, but not in a competitive manner. I'm not trying to outsell her or beat her, I'm just trying to learn from her and use her momentum to get my own ass moving. We're even discussing a collaborative show. How cool would that be?

In business, I find that women are each others worst enemies. The egos, the fear, the sheer exhaustion... at the end of the day female lawyers just don't have a lot to give each other in the way of support. Whether it's backstabbing or just forgetting about that female colleague on the other side of the office, working in a law firm can be a lonely place for a 31 year old woman.

I want to change this, at least in my own life. I am going to support my new friend A., and learn from her. I hope I have some lessons she can take from me as well. I hope we both succeed, and can do so while supporting each other. Look at this little extroverted introvert go!